I’ve written today’s post ten different times and nothing sounds — or feels — right. My life seems so insulated and suffocating this week and I desperately want to say and do all the right things.
feeling | The biggest feeling this week is that Black Lives Matter — they matter so much. Not just the ones who think the same way as me. Not just the ones who share my faith. Not just the ones on the right side of the law. ALL OF THEM. I’m trying so hard not to center myself in this conversation, but I feel heartbroken and overwhelmed and motivated to be and do better.
wearing | I’m wearing my emotions on my sleeve. I fell apart trying to watch a television show with Josh the other night and then cried while watching a morning show the next day. I’m struggling to be a normal person and also absorb all of the very necessary information in the world.
buying | We’re buying lots of books this week. I ordered some that had been on my list for a while (White Fragility, So You Want to Talk About Race, and Just Mercy. A friend recommended some great middle grade and YA options and I’m looking at children’s book bundles from a few Black owned bookstores for Polly. I’m going to set aside “reading for fun” and instead focus on literature that can teach me something.
craving | I’m craving great change, both within my home and in my community at large. I cant believe some of the social media posts I’ve been seeing and it’s so disheartening to know that you know people who disagree with you so vehemently.
discussing | We are having plenty of hard conversations in our house right now. Conversations about Black Lives, conversations about protests and riots, conversations about our president and his lack of compassion, conversations about how Jesus would expect us to act. I have a feeling casual conversation will escape us for quiet some time.
